Find You in the Dark

Find You in the Dark by A. Meredith Walters
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

My impressions after finishing this book: emotionally exhausting, sad, tragic. This is dysfunctional love on a highly elevated level.

This is the story of Maggie, high school senior with a boring life. She's a bit emo and self-pitying despite having wonderful parents who love her and a couple of wonderful friends. The book is told in first person and when we meet her, initially Maggie seems to be an average girl, happy but bored with her life. But as soon as her conversations with her friends begins her sarcastic voice emerges. On the one hand it gave her character some depth - but on the other hand it was just annoying. This is a girl with a great home life and good friends, so why does she need to be so stand-offish? If all this can be attributed to her insecurity, it makes sense. Otherwise it's completely at odds with the person we meet at the outset.

It is also the story of Clay. Poor guy, he's the new kid at school and as soon as Maggie crashes into him he's confronted with her arrogant attitude. The mystery that surrounds him is well done. I didn't guess his situation as much as recognize it. It's always nice to discover a plot rather than predict it. He's a great guy in a bad situation, trying desperately to overcome his demons with both a lack of support and a high schooler's perspective. Even as we root for him we're torn up by his innate inability to fix himself.

The relationship between Maggie and Clay was just tragic - and this because it was so realistic. It was painful to watch because it was so much like real life. Believable? Absolutely. Entertaining? Not so much. These characters were well-developed, full of depth, rich, even likable at times. But overall they were painful to watch as they tried to navigate a situation that in real life ends badly.

There's no cliffhanger but not really a happy ending, either. On the one hand it's a relief that things came to a head and finally it's over. On the other hand it's worth picking up the sequel just to see how things turn out. The sequel promises to hold the same types of struggle that the this one does, but hopefully with a more uplifting ending.

This book is heart-wrenching and hard to read. Great characters? Check. Good writing? Check. Entertaining? Not so much. Tragedy is hard even when it's as well done as this is.

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